I have been absolutely moved by the support I have found online from the pagan community. Now, I don't completely define myself as pagan, but I define myself as a Naturist. I don't even know if the term has been used before, but if it hasn't, I now coin it in the name of those women and men who see their roles as they would be in any natural sense. In nature, how we might be without these gadgets, strict gender definitions and preconceived roles.
I became a mother a little over a year ago, I went through emotional, physical and mental anguish because the labor was not only un-godly long, but the roles that were defined for me as a woman and mother in the church I grew up in were very unyeilding. And while there are many in that line of faith that would support me in redefining myself as a woman and mother; there are still too many dogmatic limitiations on those who would support me.
So, I follow the one thing that's been there my entire life. Nature. My family we grew up in it, we moved to be closer to it and we always tried to find ways to stay within it's grasp.
I've always felt a connection with a more down-earth form of worship and with the nature based traditions of crystal healing, crystal energy and working within nature to find balance.
Thank you to everyone who has welcomed me to different online pagan communities and suggested readings and ways of parenting that are conduscive to dual religious marriages.